


Ilos, Subtle Truths, and A Night of Passion

by caprithebunny



Category: Mass Effect - All Media Types, Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: First Time Together, M/M, NSFW, Night before ilos, Sweet Sex, Trans Shepard, kaidan is a gentleman
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-15
Updated: 2018-11-15
Packaged: 2019-08-24 05:26:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,563
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16633805
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/caprithebunny/pseuds/caprithebunny
Summary: It's the night before Ilos, and Shepard is running out of time. So much work is left, yet he just doesn't have time to get it all in before... Well, before go time. Just as his headache begins to settle in, LT Kaidan Alenko arrives just in time. Revelations of feelings and other truths ensue.





	Ilos, Subtle Truths, and A Night of Passion

Shepard quietly works at his desk, shuffling papers back and forth between stacks, finishing up reports, and filing away everything into an electronic format. Pressure was building in the back of his mind; too much was riding on him now. If he didn't finish all of this in the next few hours... He may never get the chance to. His left hand was beginning to cramp from all the writing. His tired eyes flicker to the lower right corner of his desktop, searching for the time.  _ 22:30 _ . It seems he's been working for a good two hours with no break. Just as he's considering taking a few minutes to relax his hand, a knock comes at his door. “Hey, uh, Shepard. I was wondering if I could talk to you.” Kaidan's calm, smooth drawl brings a burst of heat to Shepard's stomach; a lot of flirting and interest had passed between the two since they first started working together, and while they hadn't been able to fully act on it yet...

“Yeah. Yeah, Kaidan, c'mon in.” Shepard turns away from the desk as he speaks, and stands as the doors softly hiss open. Kaidan walks in, his dark hair looking either windblown or as though he'd been thinking for some time and kept running his hands through it. Many times, Shepard has wanted to do the same thing... “What'd'you need?” 

His whiskey eyes search the tired ones, but for what? Whatever the Canadian is looking for, Shepard is unsure if he finds it as Kaidan turns away from him. “I...” He sighs, a muscle working in his jaw. “I wanted to know something. Well, a lot of somethings, but they all deal with the same thing.” Again, those soulful eyes piece Shepard, as does the open expression on Kaidan's face; a mix of uncertainty, sadness, hope and something else seems to swirl and mix together as he watches. 

“Sure, Kaid. Anything you want to talk about, I'm open to listening.” A small smile quirks at his lips and brightens the near sorrowful look trying to take over. He comes closer to his commanding officer, till they both stand with only a few inches between them. One of Kaidan's warm, calloused hands come and gently cradle Shepard's elbow. 

“I need to know, Shepard. I know there's been some flirting. Hell, there's been a lot of flirting. You've listened to me tell you some of my worst memories, and then took it in stride without ever once pitying me. That... That means a lot. You have no idea how much of what you've done means to me.” His eyes flicker away, traveling over the rather small captain's quarters, before coming back to Shepard. “Are you wanting something more? Or have I taken things the wrong way?” His face settles into a serious look, some frown lines appearing on his forehead. A nervous jolt races over Shepard's skin, his nerves finally into an anxious crescendo after the slow build up that has worked its way into him. He lets out a soft chuckle as he warmly takes Kaidan's other hand into his, reveling in how their palms feel pressed together. 

“I definitely want more, Kaidan. I just, uh...” Shepard laughs. “I'm just absolutely crap in telling people so.” Kaidan's lips curve into a toothy grin, to the point of showing off the slightly crooked lateral incisor on his left side. A sudden urge of mischief and arousal makes Shepard want to wonder what Kaidan's soft looking lips would taste like, and what it'd feel like to run his tongue over that little crook... His attention is drawn back when Kaidan begins chuckling impishly, a certain dark twinkle in his eye making Shepard raise one of his brows. Kaidan pulls away from him, and immediately he misses the warmth that seems to radiate from the other man. But then, Kaidan winds his arms around his waist, coming nose to nose with Shepard now. Mischief has joined the dark twinkle in his whiskey eyes. He leans in close, his lips softly brushing the other's outer ear, eliciting shivers of electricity and heat down his spine. 

Kaidan's voice is low and raspy as he whispers into Shepard's ear, “I came in here for something more than that to be honest, Shepard. I came for a  _ lot _ more.” Shepard releases a groan when Kaidan's hands begin exploring his back, his roughened hands teasing the sensitive skin that covers it. “I hope you don't mind.” The rumbling chuckle that follows begins a slow but eager knot in his stomach. One of his hands buries into Kaidan's tangled hair while the other lightly explores the skin just underneath the untucked t-shirt Kaidan has on. Oh, he was alright with it.  _ Perfectly _ alright with it. But, he also knew he had to be honest with Kaidan, and that ran over him like cold water. 

“Oh, I know. And believe me, I want that too... more than you know. But, there is... one thing we have to talk about before we go any further.” Kaidan pulls his head back from the beginning kisses he had planted on Shepard's neck to look at the man fully in the face. His confused face further set Shepard's anxiety ablaze, but he tried to steel himself from showing it. “I'm trans, Kaidan. I've had a surgery for breast tissue reduction, and I've been on testosterone for nearly ten years now, but I wanted you to know. It'd be cruel of me to let you go in blind, expecting one thing and finding another.” Shepard could feel his face and neck starting to burn as he silently waits for Kaidan's reaction. 

Shepard's breath hitches as a slow smile overtakes Kaidan's confusion. His hands rise to cup Shepard's face, no doubt pricked by the stubble currently residing there. “Thank you for telling me. Really. I can tell it was hard for you. But...” The smile turns into something more like a smirk as Kaidan brings his bottom lip into between his teeth. Shepard's arousal kicks back into drive as he slowly releases it, and he barely clamps down the moan struggling in his throat as those now amber coloured eyes burn him from underneath Kaidan's dark lashes. “...I don't care about what's in your pants, Shepard. I care about you, and that would still be so even if I found out you had two dicks or nothing down there at all.” His low tone and words add more fuel to the knot in Shepard's apex, and when Kaidan's hands go back to their roaming of his body, he can't help rubbing his thighs together for some relief. 

Then, without warning, Kaidan crushes his lips to Shepard's in a heated kiss. Shepard nearly stumbles, but Kaidan's hands and strong arms keeps him balanced. Kaidan's teeth and tongue tease his lips until he opens to him, then they begin a clash of tongues and teeth. Shepard eventually gives in to Kaidan, who quickly takes over with multiple passionate, fervent kisses. They only part when Shepard begins to tug at Kaidan's shirt, signaling him to take it off. Both men breathe heavily, their lips already beginning to puff up from the rough kisses. Kaidan grabs his shirt hem and pulls it over his head, then flings his shirt elsewhere near the bed. His chest muscles have some defining and he seems built to be strong. Curly, dark chest hair dusts over the top part of his chest, thinning over his stomach, then thickening again as it leads down under his pants. Shepard's preoccupation with his chest causes him to miss Kaidan kicking his shoes and socks off, until he speaks up. “You going to stare all day Shepard, or are you going to let me do some staring too?” Kaidan nearly purrs the question, his eyes smouldering into Shepard's. With a rough swallow, Shepard divests himself of his shirt, letting it drop from his hands to the floor. Kaidan slowly stalks towards him, and upon him getting to within arm's reach, Shepard can see his pupils are completely blown and his irises nearly too dark to see. Kaidan kisses him again, softer but still firm, as he begins to unbutton and unzip Shepard's trousers. He reciprocates, finding Kaidan's fly after some searching with his finger tips. 

As their pants crumple to the floor, Kaidan begins leading Shepard backwards, towards the captain quarter's bed. A slightly worried thought enters Shepard's brain on how Anderson might react to the idea of him and the lieutenant... messing the bed, but those thoughts leave his mind quickly as he is being pushed back towards the bed side. Shepard lets himself fall back, but drags Kaidan with him. They collapse together onto it, giggling as the bed creaks in protest. Shepard lets the fingers of one hand again knot into Kaidan's hair, with the other hand runs down his chest, curling through the chest hair, then onward till he reaches Kaidan's dark blue briefs. The hand slips under their hip band, then begins to massage and play with the hardening cock he finds there. Kaidan grunts, his hips moving with Shepard's hands. Shepard sighs softly as his lover pulls away from their kiss, then bites his lip softly as Kaidan begins nibbling his way down his jaw and onto his neck. He feels Kaidan's briefs being tugged away and when he looks down, sees that he's removing them and currently working them down his legs. Shepard uses his foot to help, chuckling as, after they hit the floor, Kaidan begins working on his as well. They shift together as he works them down Shepard's legs, ending with him kicking them off into the floor. Shepard nips at Kaidan's collarbone as the man begins to pull away from him, his hand gently pulling Shepard's away from his now engorged member. “Lay back,” Kaidan murmurs, nodding his head towards the pillows towards the head of the bed. Shepard's overactive and muddled brain can't understand why through the haze. 

“Why?” Kaidan snorts at his question, a smile tugging at his lips. 

“So I can return the favour, of course.” Shepard's face burns as Kaidan's eyes work their way down to look between his legs, then return to his gaze. Shepard does as Kaidan asks, pulling himself back onto the pillows, his legs and thighs spreading as Kaidan follows. They kiss again, using only their lips this time. Kaidan slowly moves down his chin, his throat, then onto his chest. He rolls one of Shepard's nipples between his teeth, earning a soft hissing moan from the man beneath him. His grin can be felt as he works his way down, his mouth getting well acquainted with Shepard's body. He moves to go over his hip, then onto his inner thigh. While his stubbed nails and fingertips mercilessly tease the other thigh, he leaves wet nibbles along the other.

Shepard can feel his whole body heating up now, making him feel like the room is far too hot. He watches, enthralled, as Kaidan plays with his thighs, somehow seeming to just the ways to make more bursts of heat and electricity fire through him. Finally, with a final look up to Shepard, Kaidan moves his way to the part of him aching for some relief. As Kaidan's mouth licks and sucks at Shepard's small member, and his fingers begin to play with his twitching opening, Shepard leans back further, one hand gripping his thigh and the other teasing his own nipple. Kaidan chuckles around him as his work elicits moans from him, furthering the tightening knot in his stomach. He clenches his pulsating walls around the finger Kaidan inserts into him, and lets out a noise of bliss as a second is entered, giving him so much more to grasp. His fingers thrust straight into him, then curl as they're pulled back, back and forth, back and forth, just like Kaidan's tongue wrapping and running over his enlarged clitoris. Shepard's hips begin to buck towards Kaidan, his breath becoming both labored and short. The growl his grinding and bucking pulls from Kaidan sets him on fire, and he pulls his hand from his chest to grab the headboard for more stability. Shepard uses what he's being given, working himself over the now slick fingers, trying to keep his body from curling in on itself as his legs shake and his body surges towards its orgasm. His own moans and cries further arouse him, and it only takes him a few more moments before his toes are curling, his legs spasming everywhere as his inner walls do the same. He crumbles onto the pillows, the waves of heat pulsing from his lower abdomen beginning to be replaced by a sense of peace and relief. He can somewhat hear himself laughing softly over the pounding of his heart in his ears. He can feel Kaidan pull his fingers and lips from his relaxing body, and feels lips moving over his still sensitive skin. 

“Mmm...” He hums as he kisses Shepard's sweat covered neck, his hands working the still jelly-like body's muscles to relax Shepard further. He softly hisses as a hand wraps around him again, firmly stroking him as the thumb of the hand rubs circles over his head. Shepard continues stroking and rubbing him until his body becomes able to continue. 

“Kaidan.” It takes only his name being uttered to get the other man's attention. Shepard licks his top lip slowly while he looks at Kaidan, reveling in the soft growl that comes from him. He neglects the aching member to help guide Kaidan into a better position, then returns to it. He can feel the heat coming from the engorged cock, and he feels his entrance beginning to twitch in anticipation. He teases both of them as Kaidan kisses him, dipping the head into himself, then running it up and down his pulsing folds. He shivers as Kaidan's growling grows louder and his hips presses towards him. Deciding to forgo the teasing, he guides him back to his entrance. Kaidan groans and pulls his mouth away as he gives a few shallow thrusts, his eyes closing as his mouth begins to open at its own will. He holds himself up onto one of his elbows as his other hand cups Shepard's left knee and pulls it up to nearly touch his chest. His thrusts deepen in time with Shepard's gasping, angling his hips to where he grinds against the man every time he presses into him. Kaidan's head rests in the cradle of Shepard's neck and shoulder, smiling at the little nonsensical words coming from his parted lips. It didn't take Shepard long to come again, squeezing and pulsing around Kaidan. He barely was able to pull himself away from Shepard as he felt his own orgasm needing to be released, leaking semen onto his thigh and over the bed next to it. Shepard cradled his stiffened form, his hand gently running over his back until it was over. They laid in silence for a long time, listening to their shared breathing, the impending trip to Ilos no doubt clouding their foggy minds. Deep inside of Shepard, a part of him promised himself that he'd be in Kaidan's arms again, even if he had to fight through hell to make it so.

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Hey, thank you so much for reading! I'm hoping to do more with lgbt+ characters in the future, as there is so little representation for them! If you feel anything is off about my characterisation, let me know!


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